well, well. exams are over, and the results come in. i didn't do that great. well, it was expected. you reap what you sow, and well, let's just say i didn't sow that much. so yeah, from now on, i'm going to study like every single day. at least an hour and a half a day. i know i can do it, and i will. chinese o's are just around the conner, yet, i'm not nervous at all. i just passed for chinese. great. i'm scared now. i think. things can't be just fun and games anymore, it's time to get down to the grim and dirty.

Feelings rush back for that specific person out of the blue. I have no idea why. We were talking about him, caleen and i. just then, they flooded back into my memory. Maybe I was never over him. Maybe. But it’s impossible, between me and him. It is utterly impossible, unless for some miracle. This may not be the most unexpected, considering. And he’s not ugly, so yeah. It’s past due time.

I’m numb, and empty. I don’t know why I’m feeling these feelings once again. Why is that so. Sigh. I hope it somehow goes away. The feeling of paranoia and fear. I stink of it. I hate it.

getovergetovergetovergetovergetovergetovergetovergetovergetovergetovergetovergetover.

caught poseidon with the girls on thursday. it was surprisingly good. i enjoyed myself, besides for that particular incident. i was so pissed, tho i acted as if nothing happened. so yeah. lying is easy. ((:

tomorrow's jac's party and i have to celebrate ben's birthday. well, happy birthday to you guys yeah. i love you guys.

i think.

loves,

manda.

The remembrance of who I am.

No more chains
That you gave me

Enough of pain
Now I’m craving
For something sweet, so delight.

Silly patterns that we follow
You pull me in
I’m being swallowed.
By the ones you think you love
They pull you down
You can’t see up above.